I am little curious as to how many women opened up the bulletin today, read what the sermon was going to be on and had an enormous urge to get up and walk out. I am also wondering how many men, after seeing the sermon topic, looked sheepishly at the women sitting next to them, and had an equally enormous urge to crawl under the pew. I won't stand up here today and pretend that this is not an issue in our world, in our country, and in our congregation. I will not stand up here and pretend that there are not men in this church who do not love their wives as they should. I will not stand up here today and pretend that all the women in this congregation follow God's guidelines for submitting to their husbands. I will not pretend that there are not young men and women who are not following these guidelines from God. I will not pretend that I am perfect here either.

This lesson from Ephesians applies to all of us today, whether you are younger or older, single, engaged, married, divorced, or widowed. For this lesson starts out with verse 21, "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ." Those words are speaking to our hearts as Christians. They are echoed by the words of Philippians 2:3 "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves." These words from Ephesians also emphasize Jesus words in Matthew 20:26, "whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant."

God gives us guidelines on how we should treat one another and then he applies those principles to our relationships. God wants wives to submit to their husbands and he wants husbands to love their wives. He does not want the divorce rate in America to be fifty percent. He does not want broken homes. He wants peace among men and women. Today let us rediscover God's guidelines for Women and Men.

I. Wives submit to your husbands (verses 22-24)

The Apostle Paul does something interesting in these words. He seems to verbally take the women aside and speak to them. He then takes the men aside to speak to them. Teachers are known for this when dealing with children. Separate the parties. Instruct and then bring them together again to live peacefully. I would suggest that Paul is doing this in order that the women worry about how they live and not about their husbands and men worry about how they act and not about their wives.

And so Paul pulls aside the wives first and speaks to them. "Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord." Some churches would throw me out of their pulpit for speaking those words. I might be labeled a sexist pig if I uttered those words in our society. But there it is in black and white - in GOD'S WORD. "Submit to your husbands." Now I want you to know that the word submit is referring to the order that God established all the way back to Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. God made man the head. This is not a judgment value on women in any way.

Think of submit in this way. Imagine a semi-truck driver driving near a schoolyard. He is driving an eighteen-wheeler and out walks a 14-year-old girl with an orange sash and crossing guard badge. That young girl holds up her hand and the truck driver stops his rig at her command. That truck driver submits to the authority of the crossing guard so that good order may be maintained. Does that make the truck driver less of a person than the fourteen year old? No. Is he of less value to society than the young girl? No. He simply submits by stopping the truck for the good of all involved.

In the same way, for the sake of good order, God has established that wives ought to submit to their husbands. And God says to do this as if you are submitting to God himself. This is not an issue of a cultural view. This command does not change over time as societies progress. It was instituted in the Garden of Eden with Adam and Eve and it held true thousands of years later when the Apostle Paul wrote these words in 1 Timothy 2:12, "I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man." And do you know what? That has not changed. It is true today.

Women, I want you to think about this. Do not look at the man sitting next to you or in front of you. Look at yourself and consider if you are living a God-pleasing way. Ask yourself if you are submitting to God by following his commands? Are you sinning in your role that God has given you?

By God's grace you are forgiven. Because Jesus, being true God, made himself a lowly servant and obeyed God's will, you are forgiven. Because he placed the needs of human beings above himself and died on the cross for the sin of the world, you are saved. Because he rose triumphantly in all his glory on Easter Sunday, you too will rise in glory to be in heaven with him.

And the relationship that God established for women and men is modeled after the relationship between Christ and believers. Christ would do anything for the good of believers - even die. And so women trust his model of authority God has given us. He knows what is best for us. And in doing so, you will be imitating Christ himself, who submitted to God's will.

II. Husbands love your wives (verses 25-31)

Now men of the congregation, I hope none of you are sitting there with any sense of arrogance. For there is good reason that the Apostle Paul spends more time writing about the role of the husband. The space given to the husband's role emphasizes how vital the man's love is to the order that God has established.

Ephesians 5:25 says, "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her." Husbands love you wives. How? Just as Christ loved the church. And how did Christ love the church? He sacrificed himself for her. Christ would do anything for the good of the church. Men, that is your motivation to love. Men, that is your example to love.

And so now I want to ask you how you are doing in following Christ's example of love. And believe me, I am looking at myself also. Are you placing the needs of your wives above your own? Are you making the well-being and interests of the women in this church a priority? Ask yourselves, how can you better love your wives and the women of this congregation? How are you following Christ's example?

Each of us men has to admit that we have not been perfect. We have sinned against our wives and women in general and against God. Let us stand up and be accountable and let us ask for forgiveness. Let us ask God, because he forgives us. He heals us through the blood of Christ that was poured out on the cross. He also strengthens us to live according to his will and to follow the example of Christ.

Pray that God would strengthen you to carry out your duties in love and that you will love your wives as if they are your own bodies. Just as you would care for your own needs, you ought to care for the needs of women. Physically, it is your duty to care for their needs. You are also to care for their needs emotionally. And most importantly, you are to care for their needs spiritually. Really if you put their spiritual care first, then the rest will fall in line. As head of the house, make worship and Bible study the priority. That is your duty. As head of the house, make service to God a priority. As head of the house carry out your duties with a humble and gentle heart as you serve others and God in love and thankfulness.

This is God's order. And how blessed we are as Christians when follow this order. God established this order for our good. Now I hope no one is sitting there thinking that this does not apply to you. For this lesson from God's Word reaches us in every aspect of our lives, young, old, single, married. For we are all to submit to one another out of respect for Christ. We are all to make ourselves servants to one another. We are all God's children, forgiven sinners. We are saints in God's eyes through Christ Jesus. And remember that He blesses us when we live according to His guidelines.